Expecting the least expected

Standards, expectations, criteria, delusions, immaturity, and ignorance. All tools in the game we call dating.

I'm a contemplative person (tree induced or not). As a result I spend the majority of my day theorizing, and finding the logic behind the perceived illogical, because of this, this post will be more of my thoughts (As they all are) in an attempt to get your thoughts on what I'll call "the institution of expecting".

We as people in search of their other half, because at the end of the day that's what we're all looking for, approach the dating scene and the opposite sex in general in the same ways we approach anything we want. Look at the dating game as a grocery store and the opposite sex as a can of soup (use your damn imagination). Guy # 1 is one brand guy # 2 is another, etc. So now you're Suzy sitting in the soup isle with an unlimited number of soup brands. What do you do next, how do you differentiate between them? You look at the ingredients and of course you as a "smart" consumer probably already have a list of ingredients that you feel would be the ideal soup for you. Some may want the higher end shit and some may just want the safeway brand and go straight generic. The point is you choose your soup based off what you like and to an extent off of what not only other people have told you about that soup but your personal experience with said brand. Which in theory is a somewhat decent method of choosing.

However in order to compare people to soups we have to add in the "chef component". This "chef" refers to everyone's past experiences, parents, relationships, etc. This added factor, as anyone who frequents different establishments can attest to, can drastically effect the "taste" of the soup. What we have to understand or conceptualize is that the ingredients (criteria/standards) represent only a minute portion of a person and therefore just because a guy has a great relationship with his mom doesn't mean he doesn't beat on his girl. I guess what I'm eventually getting at is that standards or "ingredients" to some extent may in actuality be an irrelevant or mute point. Yes there are template types, and yes some "ingredients" are indicative of other actions. The problem arises when people use these indications to formulate their opinion without "tasting" the soup. Now taste however you feel, but if I was you I would taste the soup in the way which leaves the least possibility of me getting burnt. Then again we generally get burnt when we eat the soup too fast (that's another post in and of it self, I apologize but as I said these are just thoughts and therefore they're gonna be somewhat random.). I think alot of times we give the "chef" and the labeling on the can too much credit but this is another digressing point.

My last semi-structured thought on this (since it's snowing and I want to get the fuck out of here) refers to a method which I had been using until recentely.

Me and a friend got into a random conversation about expectations. A thought burst through my fingers (text convo) "it may be unrealistic. Asking the same out of people is naive and unrealistic". This response came from a short conversation in which the word picky (in reference to myself) was being thrown around. Now, thanks to all my exes I have a pretty solid and specific prototype of what I think a perfect woman would be. Unfortantely after that conversation I've been rethinking it. The point that my friend made was that "as long as you want what you have yourself it isn't unrealistic" which struck a cord. I mean how reasonable is that? I have a quality, and all I'm asking is for you to have the same one. The problem is, in my growing opinion, it is unreasonable. The biggest mistake that we make as people in my opinion is that we expect people to behave as we do, which if you've ever dealt with other people you're fully aware that it's impossible, everyone is different. So, looking for a partner who brings what you bring to the table is in actuality impossible..... unless you want to date yourself...

Maybe we should go back to a day when people were just trying soups with no prejudices against brands. No chicken noodle, vegetable soup beefs. IDK

Just thoughts. No tagged saying, no song. I would like to read your thoughts though.

-Dre